Oh, you think you’re the world’s biggest coffee lover? Huh.
Are you Nestle’s biggest brand?
Have you been helping people fall in love with coffee for 60 years?
Is the word “coffee” literally in your name? Yeah. Didn’t think so.
Frankly, it’s about time that Coffee mate left the boring world of creamer and entered the Wild West of coffee culture. Now they’re stepping a foot into the arena by with a bold claim: Coffee mate is the world’s biggest coffee lover.
Surely no one will disagree! Now, to take a big sip of coffee and press “play.”
:60 Coffee mate loves all the fun, weird, and unique ways you enjoy your coffee. We do not love all the fun, weird, and unique ways you interrupt our narrator. Stop that.
:15 Coffee mate is the world’s biggest coffee lover. UPDATE: Coffee mate retracts its previous statement, because Coffee mate is scared.
:15: Coffee mate retracts its previous statement that “vampires drink blood and not Coffee mate Kahlua & Crème.” That was a hurtful stereotype.
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